Bria and I argue nearly every morning. Usually about her hair, but sometimes about what she's chosen to wear. The child is fiercely independent when it comes to how she looks. When she was in Kindergarten, we still lived in Arizona and she had a uniform, so the conflicts were much easier to deal with.
Sometime in Kindergarten (most likely when I was confined to bed, pregnant with Sophia) she began to do her own hair. Joel would try to do it most mornings, but sometimes he just let her go to school however she'd done it herself. This trend continued into first grade, when we'd moved to another state and long after I'd given birth and was perfectly capable of helping her.
Now that she's in second grade, I finally gave up the fight. She rarely lets me touch her hair. Instead, we have hair inspection every morning. Usually, I end up telling her her hair is unacceptable like that, or to go brush it 100 times (which she never does...she'll do it maybe 10 times) or that she is limited to only two barrettes instead of 15, or...well, you get the picture. She always stomps back into the bathroom while complaining that I am mean and I don't like her to look cool.
Sundays have traditionally been the exception to the "Mom doesn't get to touch Bria's hair" rule. But lately, even that spawns an enormous fight, and she is getting more skilled, so I have been letting her do it herself more and more, even for church. So, you can imagine I was in something of a conundrum about Easter yesterday, because, after all, she is still only 7 years old and her skills only go so far.
Then I had a bright idea while we were driving along to the store on Saturday. I turned around and told the girls to raise their right hands (we do this sometimes, to make them understand what it means to make a promise) and repeat after me:
"I promise that tomorrow for Easter I will let mommy do my hair without complaining."
When I got to the part about "let mommy do my hair" Bria stopped and gave me a dirty look, but she said it (very quietly) and she promised. And sure enough, yesterday she let me curl her hair without complaint.
And the even bigger surprise? She loved it. So much, that this morning she wanted me to do it again.
And, even though she looks so much more presentable when I do her hair, I don't know how much I want this to continue. I think I kind of like her hair independence after all....it sure saves me lots of time in the morning!