Burning Questions | Overstuffed Overstuffed

Thursday, May 06, 2010

Burning Questions

Admit it.

You are guilty of asking Google questions.

I know I am.

Google is a pretty smart entity, and I almost always find the right answer.

I just worry that the people that end up on my blog don't actually get their questions answered, so I thought I'd remedy that right now because I'd feel awful if these people were left in darkness for the rest of their lives and it were all my fault.

Here we go....questions from the past 30 days:

Clever titles for voice lessons?

I was never aware that voice lessons even needed clever titles.  Or titles at all, actually. I'm so clever that I call mine just plain voice lessons. If I'm feeling super crazy, I might even call them vocal instruction.  I know.  How clever am I?

I just feel like straightforward is the best way to go here, because I'm not really sure I'd get any students if I went around calling them vociferation practice or intonation education.  Who even knows what that means?  I sure don't, and I'm clever.

Can pregnant women eat maraschino cherries?

I really don't see why not.  Cherries are good for you.  As long as they aren't stuck in a martini or some other alcoholic beverage, you should be good.  But if you have a problem with the squished up bugs that make them red, you probably shouldn't ever eat them.  The ick factor of that is just too much for me, personally.

Knee jerk response while doing long division?

I'm going to assume this is different for everybody.  I know some strange people whose knee jerk response to long division is probably something like having feelings of happiness and contentment.

My personal knee jerk response while doing long division is to run screaming from the room.

Nice words about snow?

To answer this question I shall write a Haiku for you.

Quiet, beautiful
Falls from an icy gray sky
Covers all with white

7 things a spiritual diva must have in her purse?

I get hundreds of searches about what a woman, lady, girl, general female person should carry in her purse.  I even made sure to answer the question in great detail .  I am really kicking myself here for not including the seven special things a spiritual diva must have with her at all times.  Such a glaring omission, and I apologize profusely.

And, to tell the truth, I don't know the answer to this question.  I do consider myself spiritual, and of course I'm a diva, but I never really thought to put the two things together.  I recommend you purchase the book The Spiritual Diva - Ten Principles for Becoming Faithful, Fierce, and Fabulous.   Carry it in your purse, read it in restaurants and at stoplights, and you'll be well on your way to knowing much more than just what should be in your bag.

What does it feel like to be overstuffed?

I am somewhat of an expert on being overstuffed, in case you hadn't noticed.

If we're talking about life in general, I'd say it feels overwhelming.

If we're talking about overeating, well then, it feels overstuffed. I'm pretty sure you'll recognize the feeling.

Why are preschoolers accident prone?

To teach their mothers patience, vigilance and love.  And so that the ER doctors have something interesting to do.

Why does Ginormica have white hair?

This one is simple--she obviously doesn't eat enough vegetables!


  1. There are so many things I have only recently learned that pregnant women can't have. Like aspartame. It might kill rats, but I thought it was perfectly safe for pregnant women!

  2. I so need to add google analytics to my blog. That's hysterical.

    And "Intonation Education" had me laughing so hard I almost spit out my drink.

  3. Man....
    Lots of questions for you. :)
    It's like having a 3 year old. :)

  4. hahahahahaha! oh, well, your blog is THE fountain of wisdom! loved it! hugs!

  5. Okay, I demand that you go back to the squished up bugs/cherries thing. Please?

  6. Great questions. Whenever I see that people have landed on my blog because of a google search, I always get a bit disappointed to see their stay was, like 0 seconds. Did I do something wrong???

  7. You ARE very clever - hee hee still laughing out loud . . .


  8. Those were great searches. I love seeing how people ended up on my blog and I've been keeping a list for a rainy day post.

    Who knew there were 7 things a spiritual diva needs in her purse. What is I only have 5?

  9. Red AC was originally manufactured from coal tar but is now mostly made from petroleum. Despite the popular misconception, Allura Red AC is not derived from any insect, unlike the food colouring carmine which is derived from the female cochineal insect (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Allura_Red_AC).

  10. The bug thing is wrong. That is one dye that is used for some products, but maraschino cherries use FD&C Red 40, which is petroleum based/derived. Ever so much better than dried bugs...

  11. I wondered about the squished up bug comment too. I'm not sure that petroleum is better though. Ew.

  12. Ack! Now I don't know what to believe about the bugs. I got my info from Popular Science magazine last year. They said maraschino cherries, strawberry yogurt and something else I can't remember used the bugs. But, as I am now having to stay away from all of the artificial/natural colors, it doesn't matter anymore.

  13. I'm no diva ... but maybe if I get that book I'll be on my way ... glad you had the time to answer these burning questions today - ha haha - what fun!

  14. Wow, those are some interesting questions. I think my favorite question is the spiritual diva one. But I loved your haiku for the snow question.

  15. Hey Girl I wanted to be the first one to tell you you won the CANVAS on Natalie's Sentiments Congrats!

  16. Sometimes the things that people type into search engines just make me shake my head.

    And want to lock my doors.

  17. So, my 9 year old son came home angry last week and he said, "I'm so ANGRY!" So I asked him why and he said "Because they're not doing end of level testing yet!", which would include that long division. Actually, he's only reached remainders, but he thinks division is the coolest thing ever, and he's going to be doing Krypto at the district Math Olympiad competition. To each his own!!! --Amanda B.

  18. Oh, Lara! You are too funny! I needed a good chuckle. Thanks!

  19. Hysterical! Happy Mother's Day, Lara!

  20. I love me the google analytics! So funny

    Happy Momma's day!

  21. I'd never pondered the red bug thing. Ick.

  22. Love that haiku! Brillers, every last bit of this post. It was mmmmm.