When I was young, scruffy, and unserious (i.e. age 1 to 24), I never really thought much about the institution of marriage. Actually living 24x7 with a real girl with make-up, painted toe-nails, and Danielle Steele novels (i.e. marriage) seemed like an ancient, abstract art taught in church and nurtured in Leave it to Beaver episodes, but utterly unconnected to my current or future reality.
I never dated much and rarely had the courage to ask opposite gender entities to "go out" with me. To me, girls really did bite. I'll never forget being forced to do a play in Hawaii when I was 9, and one of my dirty assignments was to actually hold a girl's hand. I bitterly complained, cried, and swore in Hawaiian - the prospect of exchanging hand fluids with an "opposite" was too much to bear. So the wise and poorly paid director made a compromise: we would hold opposing ends of a Smarties candy, never touching flesh, but still looking as if we were making phalangeal contact.
I'm smiling in this picture (9 yrs old) because I didn't have to touch that girl:
Then along came Lara ... and everything changed. We were drawn to each other like fruit flies on a wild peach. She was gorgeous. Her smile was radiant. She had a funny and sarcastic personality. She was spiritual.
She was silly:
She was mysterious:
She was sassy:
And she promised to be a great homemaker.
So we decided to get together, the gorgeous babe and the scruffy Afro man:
And I couldn't believe what I had been missing! When I was around her, I didn't want to do anything else. Because nothing else seemed to matter. I didn't want to eat or drink. I didn't want to breathe, even. I just wanted to be with her, to enjoy her smile, to see her twitterpated gazes, and to talk and laugh together. I would do anything for her. Because I loved her ... a lot.
So naturally the loathsome proposition of "mawage" uncomfortably crept in and I cringed, just like I always had. But this time the discomfort didn't last 24 years. Because now I felt something I had never before experienced. The whole marriage thing still seemed abstract, but I knew that when I was around Lara, I had a wonderful feeling and an immense joy that stayed with me day and night. I knew that she felt the exact same way. And keeping this unique, wonderful happiness intact and vibrant was worth every effort, every price, every sacrifice.
If this was what marriage meant, then I wanted it, more than anything on earth. So I did it - I married Lara and it was the best decision of my life, the one "that made all the difference."
Now, after 11 years, I love this gorgeous woman more than ever, and those feelings of joy and twitterpation have only been magnified and intensified. She's funnier, she's more beautiful, she's more talented, she's more giving, she's more spiritual, she's more sarcastic, she's the mother of three beautiful children, and we're in love more than ever. And thankfully she doesn't read Danielle Steele...
So this birthday post to my gorgeous wife is a big thank you, Lara, for helping me realize that marrying you was the best decision I could have ever made.
I love you (oh, and Happy Birthday)!
Joel
Friday, August 13, 2010

Lara Neves
Lara is mom to three daughters—two teens and a tween. She loves to share her parenting and homemaking triumphs and failures here at Overstuffed! She was diagnosed with Lyme disease in 2015 and has been fighting it ever since. When she isn't working on her mother of the year award, you can find her reading, singing, or taking photos.
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Wow, that was great. I'm impressed. She is very awesome. Happy Birthday Lara.
ReplyDeleteI really was wondering if women still read Danielle Steele novels. Thanks for at least answering that as far as Lara is concerned:)
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm sure she loves being compared to a fruit fly, right?
This is the sweetest thing ever. You totally scored with Lara, Joel. She is pretty amazing. (And from what I hear, you're not too shabby yourself.) :) Happy Birthday, Lara!
ReplyDelete{get a room you two} :)
ReplyDeleteAwww my heart just melted! You too are too cute!
ReplyDeleteI love all those photos. I'm sure Lara will too!
ReplyDeleteHappy Anniversary--you're both excellent people!
Delightful. Especially after I figured out that this was being written by Joel, and that first picture was not, in fact, of Lara at age 9. Nothing personal, but my first thought was, "Wow. She really grew into her looks, huh?"
ReplyDeleteAll that means, Joel, is that you make a much better looking guy than gal!
Oh, and Happy Birthday, my darling friend!
ReplyDeleteLOVE THIS!!!!!! Love you all! Joel is hilarious, and we can't wait for all your funnies together on the cruise. Happy Birthday Lara! Love Brittany and Nate ~ your almost Cuban family members :)
ReplyDeleteHappy birthday, Lara. And Joel, you are a peach yourself!
ReplyDeleteWhat a terrific post. And what a great couple you make. Sounds like you deserve each other.
ReplyDeleteHappy Birthday! Very, very nice post!
ReplyDeleteOnce I realized it was Joel posting, the smile crept on to my face until it spread from ear to ear. Beautiful post and Happy Birthday Lara!
ReplyDeleteOH! How sweet!! What a good hubby!!
ReplyDeleteWhat a sweet tribute! And my husband doesn't even read my blog, even when it's about him! You scored, Lara!
ReplyDeleteJoel, that was an awesome tribute to your terrific wife! Very Good Hubby! :) Happy Birthday Lara!
ReplyDeleteHappy birthday, Lara! And Joel's definitely a keeper.
ReplyDeleteHappy Birthday, gorgeous! Maybe I should pay Joel to post on my blog as my hubby, Greg?! LOL! Hang on to that one girl!
ReplyDeleteWhat a great post!! Nice to hear from the Maestro. Happy birthday, Lara!
ReplyDeleteI love it!!!
ReplyDeleteAnd happy birthday!
How sweet and tender - truly romantic :)
ReplyDeleteKristin
COOLEST post EVER.
ReplyDeleteAwesome post! Lara, you have the world in Joel. What a beautiful couple you are. What love.
ReplyDeleteeach time I am so late in saying happy birthday to you! because around this time we are always in our holiday. nevertheless, what a beautiful post and a great birthday present! keep up the good work... ahem... love, guys!
ReplyDelete